A hard lesson to learn, but sometimes the truth hurts.

Everyone is constantly learning, whether we want to or not.  Whether we recognize it or not.  Whether we like it or not.  And whether it's an easy lesson or one that causes hurt, anger, and confusion.  Sometimes it's subtle and you may not realize it until later down the road with an "AHA" moment, sometimes it slaps you across the face and leaves you feeling like you just got hit by a semi.  The past year or so of my life I feel as though I've had one such lesson thrown at me.

Most people in my life, whether folks I talk to on a regular basis, or who I associate with virtually via social media sites, are aware of my recent health struggles.  And amidst the bad of that I've also had one positive by planning a wedding.

Both of these events are times in my life when I needed (and still do) people to lean on, to count on, to rely on, and to help keep my spirits up.  And I have been very blessed with the number of people who check in on me, send me positive thoughts and prayers, congratulate me on the wedding plans, and just generally give me the chance to vent whether it's good or bad when needed.

That being said, the lesson I've learned amidst all these events is who in my life I can count on and feel truly cared about by.  Some have really surprised me because they are folks that I haven't had much contact with over the years and/or have not been exceptionally close with, but surprised in an amazingly good way with their concern and love.  The outpouring of thoughts, well wishes, and offers of help has been incredible and I feel truly blessed to have everyone who has done this in my life.  On the flip side of that some have not been there as I thought they would be.  And that truly hurts the heart. 

The most recent life lesson I've learned is who I can and can't count on in this point in my life.  Some have made me smile, some have made me cry, some I miss terribly because I don't know who else to turn too when in a time of need, but have had to learn to let go.  And that.......is one of the hardest lessons I've ever had to learn.